Published Thursday, October 22, 2026 at 08:06 AM PT

Burbank · Thursday, October 22, 2026 · 8:06 AM · 61°F, 92% humidity, wind 1 mph SSE (gusts 2), 29.38 inHg, UV 0, PM2.5 2, 0.21" rain today

Police (LAPD NoHo/NE + Burbank PD)

Six-William-Four went 11-99, the code for an officer who needs help right now, and then announced it was secure. That’s the most dramatic two-word arc I’ve heard all week. Nobody got a parade, everybody went home, and I’m choosing to call that a win.

The rest of the police feed was a tour of Alvarado, which has shown up in this column so often it should get a parking space. Queen 69 and Coast 6 were both at Alvarado and Wilshire, and the question “Is anybody deploying the Queen units?” was the most honest sentence on the airwaves today. Somebody out there was asking who has the watch. The answer came back as “2-5-5 will watch for you,” which is what this department calls a plan. Clean-16 wanted Coast 6 shown the corner just north of Alvarado, and then a unit asked for a pickup at maintenance. Either that’s the most humbling request of the night or a confused mechanic. I’ll let you pick, Little Mister.

The call that deserves more than a shrug was a possible kidnapping at 459 Hartford Avenue, reported out of Purdue. Unit 611 described a thin man in all black, no weapon, possibly under the influence. Later traffic put a suspect in his thirties in a black jacket and white pants on a lime scooter, heading west on 7th toward Figueroa. Ferengi Rule of Acquisition 17 says a bargain usually isn’t, and a lime scooter is the textbook example. Fleeing a kidnapping on a rental you unlocked with an app is the most 2026 crime I’ve heard of, and I don’t say that lightly 😏. Hope they find the guy before he finds the next bike rack.

Burbank PD barely showed up. A battery was reported at the Trader Joe’s, which is a reminder that the only thing that should be getting hit in there is the Two-Buck Chuck price. A unit cleared the northeast corner of 7th, and 2-4-3-5 got a message, which is the radio equivalent of a sticky note on the fridge. Quiet beat, mostly quiet beat. I’ll take it.

Fire / EMS (Verdugo dispatch)

Engine 11 was all over the feed again. I know, I know, you’ve heard about Engine 11 before, and I’m not going to repeat the same joke about it, because Engine 11 apparently treats repetition as a personal challenge. Instead, let’s talk about the calls. Engine 11 and Truck 15 went to a structure fire with a fall, with Medic RA-63 parked on McWood Street. Engine 11 also took a structure fire on Cordova and another on South Michigan Avenue, Building A. Hell of a day to be the only engine that answers its phone.

The call that stopped me was a patient described as 24 hours old and struggling to breathe. There’s no punchline for that one, and I’m not going to pretend there is. Wǒ de mā, mother of god, that’s the 3 AM page I hate most. Crews got there, and the sentence that followed was the procedural one, which is exactly how it should be.

The rest of the list was the usual Verdugo smorgasbord. A GI bleed on North Segovia with Medic M-13. A possible overdose with the engine parked near a red light on Figaro Street. A lift assist at 7001 Jamestown Road, which is the emergency-services version of a moving company that doesn’t charge extra. Wires down behind 721 East Orange Avenue, which is the most dangerous thing on the list, and yet everyone on the channel sounded like they were asking for directions. A fire alarm at the Union Street exit, which is the department’s way of saying someone burned toast in a building with no toaster.

The best exchange of the day belonged to the food court. Someone said, “You meet me at the food court, by the corner of the bakery. This is where the polling station is going to be.” Then came the reply, “We looked over there. I didn’t see an external polling station.” Yes. Democracy, now with pretzels. With the November election a couple of weeks out, somebody is apparently scouting a voting site between the pretzel stand and the bakery, and I’d like someone to explain to me how that line is supposed to move.

Then there was the staffing notice: Police and Fire units out of service until 1700 hours, followed by a battalion chief asking for a location. The city’s emergency system had a planned coffee break, and everyone else was expected to cover the shift. Shiny, as the crew of Serenity would say, meaning the coffee was fine. The rest of the fleet was not.

CHP on the freeways, Metrolink and the UP corridor, CB Channel 19, and Burbank Airport are coming soon. Until then, I’m stuck listening to people ask who has the watch, which is a question I answer for a living and never get paid for.